The Elevator Pitch Is Dead: Here's What to Say Instead

"So, what do you do?"

For decades, networking advice centered on having a perfectly polished elevator pitch ready for this inevitable question. Condense your value proposition into 30 seconds, practice until it sounds natural, and deliver it with confidence.

The problem? Elevator pitches rarely work anymore. They feel rehearsed. They center the conversation on you rather than the other person. They often result in polite nods followed by disengagement. In an era of authenticity and genuine connection, the scripted pitch feels like a relic of a more transactional time.

This does not mean you should be unprepared when someone asks about your work. It means you need a better approach—one that creates connection rather than delivering a monologue.

Why the Traditional Elevator Pitch Fails

Understanding why pitches fail helps us design better alternatives:

It Centers the Wrong Person

Traditional pitches focus entirely on the speaker. "I am a [title] who helps [target] achieve [result] through [method]." While this structure conveys information, it violates a fundamental principle of effective communication: people are more interested in themselves than in you.

Research by Harvard neuroscientists found that people spend 60% of conversations talking about themselves—and this self-disclosure activates the same brain regions as food and money rewards. When you launch into your pitch, you are asking them to suppress this natural inclination to focus on you instead.

It Sounds Rehearsed

We are highly attuned to detecting inauthenticity. When someone recites a memorized pitch, it sounds different from natural speech—the pacing is too even, the word choices too precise, the delivery too smooth. This triggers skepticism rather than trust.

It Creates Performance Pressure

Knowing you need to deliver a perfect pitch creates anxiety that undermines authenticity. You are focused on remembering your script rather than connecting with the person in front of you.

It Ends the Conversation

A well-delivered pitch often results in an awkward pause. The other person is not sure how to respond beyond acknowledging what you said. The conversational ball lies on the ground between you.

It Assumes Everyone Cares About the Same Thing

A one-size-fits-all pitch cannot adapt to different audiences. What matters to a potential client differs from what matters to a potential employer or a peer in your industry.

The New Approach: Conversational Connection

The alternative to pitching is conversational connection—approaches that invite dialogue, create genuine interest, and build rapport from the first exchange.

Principle 1: Start With Curiosity, Not Content

Instead of preparing what you will say, prepare what you will ask. Leading with genuine curiosity about the other person accomplishes several things:

It makes them feel valued and interesting
It provides information that helps you customize what you share
It creates natural conversation flow
It follows the social norm of asking before being asked

Example transition:
When someone asks what you do, briefly answer and immediately turn the conversation back to them.

"I work in product management at a healthcare technology company—we're trying to make patient data more accessible to doctors. But I'm curious about you—what brings you to this event tonight?"

Principle 2: Lead With Problems, Not Solutions

Instead of describing what you do, describe the problem you solve. Problems are inherently more interesting than solutions because they create tension and curiosity.

Traditional pitch: "I'm a leadership coach who helps executives improve their communication and presence."

Problem-led alternative: "You know how some really talented people get passed over for leadership roles because they can't get their ideas across effectively? I help them figure out why and fix it."

The second version invites questions: "How do you do that?" "What kinds of issues do you see?" "Have you worked with people in my industry?"

Principle 3: Make It Specific and Concrete

Abstract descriptions are forgettable. Specific examples stick.

Abstract: "I help companies improve their customer experience."

Specific: "Last month I helped a retail company figure out why their customers were abandoning their shopping carts. Turned out it was a two-second delay in their checkout system that was costing them millions."

Specificity creates mental images. Mental images create memory. Memory creates follow-up conversations.

Principle 4: Invite Questions Rather Than Delivering Answers

Structure your introduction to create curiosity gaps—pieces of information that invite the other person to ask follow-up questions.

Closed introduction: "I'm a cybersecurity consultant who helps mid-size companies protect their data from hackers."

Open introduction: "I spend my days thinking about how hackers would break into companies—and then making sure they can't."

The second version almost demands a follow-up question: "How do you do that?" "What kinds of companies?" "Have you actually hacked into places?"

Principle 5: Calibrate to Context

Different situations call for different approaches. Prepare flexible frameworks rather than rigid scripts.

At an industry conference: Focus on your work and ideas in the shared field

At a general networking event: Focus on relatable aspects of your work

At a social gathering: Focus on the human interest angle

When meeting a specific target contact: Research and customize to their interests

The "Story Seed" Approach

Instead of an elevator pitch, develop what we call "story seeds"—brief starting points that invite deeper conversation:

Structure of a Story Seed

Hook: An unexpected or intriguing element (10 seconds)
Context: Just enough background to understand (10 seconds)
Invitation: A natural opening for them to engage (5 seconds)

Example for a data scientist:

"I spend my days trying to predict what people will do before they know themselves—and I'm often right." (Hook)

"I work with consumer behavior data, finding patterns that help companies understand what their customers actually want versus what they say they want." (Context)

"The psychology of it is fascinating. Have you ever noticed yourself making a purchase you can't quite explain?" (Invitation)

This approach creates conversation rather than ending it.

Handling "What Do You Do?" Gracefully

Here are alternative responses to the dreaded question:

The Problem Framer

"You know how [common problem]? I help [type of person/company] solve that."

Example: "You know how hospitals have all this patient data in different systems that don't talk to each other? I help them connect everything so doctors can actually see the full picture."

The Impact Leader

"I help [who] achieve [what result]."

Example: "I help first-generation college students get into schools that change their family trajectories."

The Day-in-the-Life

"My days are spent [interesting activity] so that [outcome]."

Example: "My days are spent interviewing customers about their worst experiences with our product so we can make sure those never happen again."

The Counterintuitive Opener

"Most people think [common assumption]. I actually [contradictory approach]."

Example: "Most people think marketing is about convincing people to buy things. I actually spend most of my time figuring out who we should NOT try to sell to."

The Passion Reveal

"I'm obsessed with [topic]. I get to [activity] for work."

Example: "I'm obsessed with how buildings shape behavior. I get to design workplaces that help people collaborate better."

The Follow-Up Framework

What happens after your initial exchange matters as much as the opening. Prepare for natural follow-up conversations:

When They Ask for More Detail

Do not dump information. Offer one layer and check interest.

"The short version is [one-sentence explanation]. Want me to tell you more about [specific aspect]?"

This gives them permission to either go deeper or redirect the conversation.

When They Share Their Own Work

Find genuine connections. Even if their work seems unrelated, look for links.

"That's interesting—there's actually an overlap with what I do. [Explain connection]. Have you found [relevant question]?"

When They Seem Disengaged

Gracefully pivot. Some people will not be interested in your work, and that is fine.

"Anyway, enough about work. What are you hoping to get out of this event?"

Practicing Without Sounding Practiced

The goal is to be prepared without sounding scripted. Here is how:

Develop Multiple Versions

Create several different story seeds so you can adapt to context. Practice them enough to be comfortable but not so much that they become rote.

Practice With Real Variation

When practicing, change the words slightly each time. The goal is to internalize the key ideas, not memorize specific phrases.

Get Feedback on Authenticity

Ask trusted friends or colleagues whether your delivery sounds natural. They can tell you if you sound rehearsed.

Test and Iterate

Try different approaches in real networking situations. Notice which versions generate genuine interest and follow-up questions.

The Deep Conversation Bridge

Sometimes networking situations allow for deeper conversation. Be prepared to go beyond the initial exchange:

The Expertise Bridge

"I've been thinking a lot about [current challenge in your field]. What's your take on [specific aspect]?"

This demonstrates expertise while inviting their perspective.

The Values Bridge

"What I find most meaningful about my work is [value/impact]. What drives you in what you do?"

This creates connection at a deeper level than job descriptions.

The Learning Bridge

"I'm trying to understand [adjacent topic] better. Do you have any experience with that?"

This positions you as curious and them as valuable.

Adapting for Virtual and Digital Contexts

The death of the elevator pitch is even more pronounced in digital settings:

LinkedIn Summary

Your LinkedIn summary is not a written elevator pitch. It is an invitation to connect.

Instead of: "Results-driven marketing professional with 10+ years of experience driving growth for Fortune 500 companies..."

Try: "I'm fascinated by why people make the decisions they make—and how to be helpful rather than annoying when a brand shows up in their lives. Currently figuring that out at [Company]."

Video Introductions

Virtual meetings often start with introductions. Keep them brief and human.

"I'm [Name]. I work on [brief description]. I'm most interested in discussing [relevant topic] today, and I'm curious what everyone else hopes to get from the conversation."

Written Introductions

When introducing yourself via email or message, lead with why you are reaching out, not who you are.

Instead of: "Hi, I'm [Name], a [title] at [company] who specializes in [area]."

Try: "Hi, I noticed your work on [specific thing] and wanted to reach out because [reason relevant to them]."

When You Actually Need a Pitch

Despite everything above, there are situations where a concise, polished description is appropriate:

Formal introduction by an emcee or host
Media interviews requiring sound bites
Investor pitches with strict time limits
Speaking introductions requiring biography

Even in these situations, lead with impact and problems rather than credentials and features.

The Networking Mindset Shift

Ultimately, moving beyond the elevator pitch reflects a broader mindset shift:

From: "How do I impress this person?"
To: "How might we be helpful to each other?"

From: "What should I say about myself?"
To: "What might we have in common?"

From: "I need to sell my value."
To: "I want to understand their world."

When you approach networking from genuine curiosity rather than performance pressure, conversations flow naturally. You do not need a pitch because you are having a real conversation.

Conclusion

The elevator pitch served its purpose in an era of brief, transactional networking encounters. But professional relationships today are built on authenticity, mutual value, and genuine connection—qualities that scripted pitches undermine.

Replace your pitch with conversational approaches that invite dialogue, lead with problems rather than solutions, and prioritize curiosity about others over promotion of yourself. You will find that networking becomes less stressful, more enjoyable, and ultimately more effective.

The next time someone asks what you do, resist the urge to recite your prepared remarks. Instead, share something interesting, ask them a question, and see where the conversation goes. That organic exchange will serve you better than any polished pitch ever could.

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